October 6, 2008

I need to vent

Please feel free to skip this post.  I am not looking for sympathy or any words of encouragement.  I just need to vent or else I am going to explode. (If you are a co-worker realize this has been slowly building over the last 7 weeks and I have to get it out or I might go insane.)

When the bell rang at 3:40 today four words crossed my mind.  I Want To Quit!  I am not the quitting type, but today I had enough.  I realized just how tired I am.

I am tired of the kids running the school.  

I am tired of no follow through with any initiatives.  

I am tired of hearing the same people gripe, moan and belly ache about the same shit every day.

I am tired of being put in charge of things that will inevitably make me look like the bad guy.

I am tired of trying to please everyone.

I am tired of hearing teachers in the adjacent rooms screaming at their students.

I am tired of seeing the same 5 kids in the hallway ALL DAY LONG, and of nobody willing to take care of it.

I understand that I teach special education and that there are students on my roster.  However, they are NOT MY OWN CHILDREN.   I have the same problems with them that  you do, please don't make me relive that ten times a day.

I am tired of scheduling meetings and having nobody show up.

I am tired of having to tell people how to do their jobs.

I am tired of waiting to see what the consequences are when we write a student a referral.  I have one kid in my advisory who has skipped it at least 3 times a week and NOTHING has happened to him!

I am tire of waiting to see the consequences for the two students who SEXUALLY HARASSED ME last week.

I am just plain old tired..... And it's only Monday!

I am so stressed out this year that my eye has already started to twitch.  This is the seventh week of school, not the seventh month.  I should not have physical issues due to stress this early in the year.  (Can't wait until my other compulsions come back.)  

Please understand that if I walk away and say "I will deal with it tomorrow"  it isn't necessarily because I am mad at you in any way.  It is simply due to the fact that I can't deal with anymore today.  I am done.  Out.  Finished.

Now, I just have to mentally prepare for tomorrow.....


5 comments:

  1. Oh, sweetie. Vent away. That's part of why we blog.

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  2. Oh I say VENT away. I think that you have the HARDEST job. I know that I am worried about working with my own teenagers I so I cann't imagine have to work woth somebody elses.

    I hope that tomorrow is better.

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  3. Whooooooa nelly.

    Both of my in-laws were teachers and they'd do the same thing every now and then. It grew increasingly frequent towards their retirement dates.

    Hang in there...you are doing a good thing.

    -Chris
    Weather Moose

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  4. My Mom is a teacher. I respect the profession and admire anyone who sticks with it. Great some rest. You deserve it!

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  5. Ahhh, venting feels good, doesn't it?

    Hope things are on the up and up for ya.

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Your input would be greatly appreciated!!!