When the bell rang at 3:40 today four words crossed my mind. I Want To Quit! I am not the quitting type, but today I had enough. I realized just how tired I am.
I am tired of the kids running the school.
I am tired of no follow through with any initiatives.
I am tired of hearing the same people gripe, moan and belly ache about the same shit every day.
I am tired of being put in charge of things that will inevitably make me look like the bad guy.
I am tired of trying to please everyone.
I am tired of hearing teachers in the adjacent rooms screaming at their students.
I am tired of seeing the same 5 kids in the hallway ALL DAY LONG, and of nobody willing to take care of it.
I understand that I teach special education and that there are students on my roster. However, they are NOT MY OWN CHILDREN. I have the same problems with them that you do, please don't make me relive that ten times a day.
I am tired of scheduling meetings and having nobody show up.
I am tired of having to tell people how to do their jobs.
I am tired of waiting to see what the consequences are when we write a student a referral. I have one kid in my advisory who has skipped it at least 3 times a week and NOTHING has happened to him!
I am tire of waiting to see the consequences for the two students who SEXUALLY HARASSED ME last week.
I am just plain old tired..... And it's only Monday!
I am so stressed out this year that my eye has already started to twitch. This is the seventh week of school, not the seventh month. I should not have physical issues due to stress this early in the year. (Can't wait until my other compulsions come back.)
Please understand that if I walk away and say "I will deal with it tomorrow" it isn't necessarily because I am mad at you in any way. It is simply due to the fact that I can't deal with anymore today. I am done. Out. Finished.
Now, I just have to mentally prepare for tomorrow.....